Bruce Wrenn April 2020
“Peace, I leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives.” John 14:27
A recent David Brooks Op Ed piece in the NYT reveals the devastating effect the Covid-19 pandemic is having on our nation’s mental health:
Last week I asked you to tell me about your mental health — how you are faring in this hard time. I don’t know what I expected; maybe some jaunty stories about families pulling together in a crisis. What you sent gutted me. There have been over 5,000 replies so far, and while many people are hanging in there, there is also a river of woe running through the world — a significant portion of our friends and neighbors are in agony.
A college student in State College, Pa., wrote that at first the lockdown seemed like a lark — a chance to get out of certain obligations. But “now almost a month into staying here, I’ve been gripped by a deep depression. My appetite is very low. I’m sleeping far too much to feel as lethargic as I do.
“My future, which seemed so bright a few months ago as I anticipated graduating in May, now seems bleak and hopeless: How will I find a job with the economy tanking? How will I pay hundreds of dollars per month when my loan bills kick in during August?”
A college junior from Vienna, Va., is going through the same thing. His career hopes now seem dashed. “I’ve spent days crying alone and feeling helpless as I’ve been stuck at my parent’s house and I find myself difficult to be around even as I don’t want to be.” Senior citizens are especially hard hit, particularly the widows and widowers. For many, it’s the painful sense of missing their grandkids, the precarity of living with a disease that could kill them at any time. For others, it’s the wrenching loneliness.
“The combination of isolation and stress is having compounded impact. I am 65, and a single woman with no nearby family. My surviving sibling lives several hours away. Six months ago, my older brother died (I am the youngest). My neighbors are not very friendly, and not once has anyone asked if I needed anything. ... I cry a lot, which is my new norm. ... So to sum it up, I’m feeling totally alone in this crisis and hopeless.”
A woman from Fresno wrote, “I am normally a very positive person, outgoing, happy, energetic. Definitely a glass half-full. However, lately I cannot get through a day without tears, often sobs. I am terrified for myself and my family and everyone in the world. All the things I love to do, I’m now afraid to do. ...
“The anxiety is also very challenging. I have not been able to eat much. I have experienced anorexia previously during times of stress — divorce, death, etc. I’ve lost 8.5 pounds in the past month. That might not sound like much, but I’m tiny and it’s 8 percent of my body weight.”
Then there are those already suffering with mental health issues. People with anxiety disorders wrote in to say that they were paralyzed by the possibility that they hadn’t washed their hands well enough, that they hadn’t disinfected enough and that they would cause their own death.
Another article in the Times on the same day, entitled “When the Pandemic Leaves Us Alone, Anxious and Depressed,” by Andrew Solomon, Professor of Medical Clinical Psychology at Columbia University Medical Center, began with this:
A new poll from the Kaiser Family Foundation found nearly half of respondents said their mental health was being harmed by the coronavirus pandemic. Nearly everyone I know has been thrust in varying degrees into grief, panic, hopelessness and paralyzing fear. If you say, “I’m so terrified I can barely sleep,” people may reply, “What sensible person isn’t?”
Has it really gotten to the point that paralyzing anxiety is the only “sensible” state of mind for us to have in the face of this scourge? Are Christians any different than non-believers in how our mental and emotional health are affected by this crisis? I have felt compelled to write this personal testimony about how I, as a Christian, am dealing with the current crisis as a response to several people asking me how I can appear at peace when surrounded by a “river of woe,” as Brooks describes the current state of society.
I am not uniquely qualified to weigh in on this topic but have been encouraged to do so by friends who are familiar with my trials and have noted what God has done to give me a sense of peace while traveling through these trials. To those of you who do not know my circumstances, I was diagnosed with Leiomyosarcoma, a particularly virulent form of cancer, in 2011, and a recent MRI revealed the tumors have spread to my lungs, liver, pancreas and spine. This results in my having an “underlying condition” that puts me one careless wipe of an eye away from being a Covid-19 statistic. Here is my testimony of what God has done to give me peace in troubled times.
Before I begin, I want to emphasize that this is a personal testimony, not a carefully researched thesis written by a trained theologian. It is born out of years of spiritual growth and revelation from seeking meaning in suffering in dealing with my disease. I understand and accept the responsibility to be exquisitely sensitive to the feelings of those who are Christians dealing with the mental and emotional health problems described by David Brooks and Andrew Solomon above. I am not judging, shaming or criticizing anyone whose experience is different from mine.
My discussion will focus on several key interrelated concepts; anxiety, peace, trust, joy and gratitude. All texts are from New International Version unless otherwise indicated.
Anxiety in Scripture
God clearly does not want us to be anxious or to spend our time worrying about the future. The longest discourse in the Sermon on the Mount is devoted to Christ telling us not to be worried about an uncertain future:
25 “Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothes?
26 Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they?
27 Can any one of you by worrying add a single hour to your life?
28 “And why do you worry about clothes? See how the flowers of the field grow. They do not labor or spin.
29 Yet I tell you that not even Solomon in all his splendor was dressed like one of these.
30 If that is how God clothes the grass of the field, which is here today and tomorrow is thrown into the fire, will he not much more clothe you—you of little faith?
31 So do not worry, saying, ‘What shall we eat?’ or ‘What shall we drink?’ or ‘What shall we wear?’
32 For the pagans run after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them.
33 But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well.
34 Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own. Matthew 6:25-34
This passage is rich in meaning, but of particular interest to me is how Christ makes a case for why believers, the Good Shepard’s flock, should not worry about their future. He cites familiar experiences into evidence that supports his case that we should not “worry about your life.” This is a masterfully designed and convincing argument. If God takes care of those animals and plants that do nothing to prepare for their future, and you are far more valuable to Him than they, doesn’t it follow that He will also be there to take care of His beloved children in their future? Beyond that, when has the act of worrying ever produced a positive outcome? This reminds me of a line in the movie “Bridge of Spies”, based on the true story of the exchange of spies between the U.S. and Russia, when Tom Hanks’ character says to the Russian spy “Aren’t you worried [whether this future exchange will take place]?” The spy’s response: “Would it help?”
Why is it so important to God that we not have anxiety about the future? Not knowing the mind of God, we can only speculate the reason based on the light we’ve been given in His Word. My reading of scripture reveals to me a Heavenly Father who yearns for a deep, intimate personal love relationship with every one of His children. Even with our inability to fully comprehend that love, it takes our breath away to see a glimmer of the magnitude of that love. Just having that incomplete understanding makes me put my trust (more on this topic later) in Him to know what is best for me and to eagerly want Him to deliver to me what is best. So He, who created us, knows how corrosive anxiety can be in eroding that relationship and leaving us with a sense of dread, as though God can’t be trusted to care for us as He does the birds in the air or the flowers in the field.
Look at how Jesus spent His last moments before His crucifixion reassuring His disciples of His provision for them so they would not be anxious:
1 “Do not let your hearts be troubled. Trust in God, trust also in me.
2 My Father’s house has many rooms; if that were not so, would I have told you that I am going there to prepare a place for you?
3 And if I go and prepare a place for you, I will come back and take you to be with me that you also may be where I am. John 14:1-3
18 I will not leave you as orphans; I will come to you. John 14:18
27 Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid. John 14:27
9 “As the Father has loved me, so have I loved you. Now remain in my love.
John 15:9
20 “My prayer is not for them alone. I pray also for those who will believe in me through their message,
21 that all of them may be one, Father, just as you are in me and I am in you. May they also be in us so that the world may believe that you have sent me.
22 I have given them the glory that you gave me, that they may be one as we are one—
23 I in them and you in me —so that they may be brought to complete unity. Then the world will know that you sent me and have loved them even as you have loved me. John 17:20-23
My take on this is that our anxiety prevents the kind of trusting, loving, peaceful relationship that God wants to have with each of us. So, He goes to great lengths through logic and appeals to our deepest yearnings for an intimate, loving bond between Him and us, to assure us that we need not be anxious about our future. We can trust the One who has prepared a place for us with Him in that future.
It is also noteworthy that in the Matthew 6 discourse, that Jesus distinguishes between His followers and “pagans,” (i.e., those people who reject God’s appeal to believe and trust in Him) for whom anxiety must be a constant state. In fact, in Deuteronomy chapter 28 God told the Israelites what they could expect if they chose not to follow Him and be covered under His protective care for His people :
34 “the sights you see will drive you mad.”
65you [will have] an anxious mind, eyes weary with longing, and a despairing heart.
66 You will live in constant suspense, filled with dread both night and day, never sure of your life.
67 In the morning you will say, “If only it were evening!” and in the evening, “If only it were morning!”—because of the terror that will fill your hearts and the sights that your eyes will see.” Deuteronomy 28:34, 65- 67
We all live in enemy territory. Peter called us “aliens and strangers in the world” 1Peter 2:11. Christ warned us that “in this world you will have trouble” John 16:33. This passage in Deuteronomy is a description of what it is like to go through perilous times in enemy territory without the protections of Providence, and surely echoes the comments in the NYT’s Op Ed quotes above. Defaulting to anxiety will be your natural state, and you will be “filled with dread” and “never sure of your life.”
What this tells me is that God wants me to be fully aware that He loves me with an “unfailing love,” as described repeatedly in scripture, and that love will continue into an infinite future. If I am anxious about the future, I anticipate a future without God in it, and since God’s unfailing love is constant and eternal, my fear of its absence in the future is irrational. That has never been true and never will be true. As Paul told us:
38 For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers,
39 neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord. Romans 8:38-39
Notice he includes the future in this description of the timeline of God’s love.
Now, if God has so convincingly explained why I, as His beloved child, can have freedom from anxiety or worry about an uncertain future, why do I still feel anxious sometimes? The answer is, because I am human and subject to all the frailties of that condition. David certainly was not immune to anxiety:
23 Search me, God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts. 24 See if there is any offensive way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting. Psalm 139:23-24
I might as well be honest about it when I am feeling anxious—God certainly knows when I am. I too, can ask God, as David did, for help with my anxieties, and remove them from me. I’ve always clung to verses like these when I’m confessing my shortcomings and frailties to God, and asking for help as David did:
13 As a father has compassion on his children, so the Lord has compassion on those who fear him;
14 for he knows how we are formed, he remembers that we are dust.
Psalm 103:13-14
A bruised reed he will not break, and a smoldering wick he will not snuff out, Matthew 12:20
So while being anxious sometimes just means I’m human, I should never think that feeling anxious disqualifies me from its remedy:
Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you. 1 Peter 5:7
Once done, I can continue the kind of trusting loving relationship with Him that we both yearn for. In my experience with my disease, I could not tell you how many times God in His infinite mercy and patience has shown me repeatedly that I can trust Him to provide for my needs, and that my anxiety was just wasted emotional energy. God bless slow learners like me!
They will have no fear of bad news; their heart is steadfast, trusting in the Lord. Psalm 112:7
Peace in Scripture
Peace is not what fills the void in your mind with the absence of anxiety. As we’ll see, Divine peace is a gift given in response to a believer’s sincere desire for it. In Isaiah’s prophesy about the coming of the Messiah, one of the titles given was Prince of Peace, and that there would be no end to His reign of peace:
6 For to us a child is born, to us a son is given, and the government will be on his shoulders. And he will be called Wonderful Counselor, Mighty God, Everlasting Father, Prince of Peace.
7 Of the greatness of his government and peace there will be no end.
Isaiah 9:6-7
One of the Divine attributes of the Godhead is peace, and peace will reign eternally in God’s kingdom. I do not know if there is theological support for this, but I wonder if when scripture says:
He has also set eternity in the human heart Ecclesiastes 3:11
it is one way of saying that all human hearts seek the eternal peace that only heaven can supply. The kind of peace that we are talking about here is Divine in nature, and is different from the definition of peace that is in the world:
Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives. John 14:27
The fruit of that righteousness will be peace; its effect will be quietness and confidence forever. Isaiah 32:17
If only you had paid attention to my commands, your peace would have been like a river, your well-being like the waves of the sea. Isaiah 48:18
Though the mountains be shaken and the hills be removed, yet my unfailing love for you will not be shaken nor my covenant of peace be removed,” says the Lord, who has compassion on you. Isaiah 54:10
Let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, since as members of one body you were called to peace. And be thankful. Colossians 3:15
It is clear from these verses that God is eager to give us the gift of peace. While it is a gift, rather than compensation for some work that has been performed, there appears to be conditions attached to who the gift will be given: “fruit of righteousness,” “covenant of peace,” “paid attention to my commands,” “called to peace.” But these are the same conditions that define being a Christian: accepting God’s gift of eternal life by believing in Jesus, repentance, being born of the Spirit, and living by faith. In other words, someone who does not believe in Christ, nor wants God to be sovereign over our hearts and mind, does not want God’s peace. They might want the peace that the world can provide, but that kind of peace, as defined by the Oxford Dictionary is:
Freedom from anxiety, disturbance, or inner conflict; calm, tranquility.
God’s peace goes far beyond just being the “freedom of anxiety, disturbance, or inner conflict.” God’s peace is the kind of peace you have when others cannot understand how anyone could be at peace under the circumstances you face. Here is how the Amplified Bible describes this peace:
6 Do not be anxious or worried about anything, but in everything [every circumstance and situation] by prayer and petition with thanksgiving, continue to make your [specific] requests known to God.
7 And the peace of God [that peace which reassures the heart, that peace] which transcends all understanding, [that peace which] stands guard over your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus [is yours]. Philippians 4:6-8
Most Bible scholars believe Paul wrote this when he was in prison and was writing to the Philippians who were themselves under severe persecution. So, both the author and recipients of the letter were being severely challenged to find peace in the circumstances they faced. Yet Paul could promise them that God can and will provide that which is impossible for non-Christians to believe could be provided. Elsewhere in scripture this kind of peace is called “perfect:”
You will keep in perfect peace all who trust in you, all whose thoughts are fixed on you! Isaiah 26:3 (NLT)
This peace is not just unusual, it is incomprehensible to the secular mind. It stands as a garrison over the hearts and minds of those believers who prayed for it. With God as its source, it is perfect in its purpose and effect.
Here is what relying on worldly peace looks like if you are going through a personal crisis. You swing between hope and despair so that when you get good news, you can have a momentary sense of peace. But such hope is transitory because we have seen the news switch from good to bad before. The sense of peace hangs by a slender thread. Bad news causes the hope and peace to immediately evaporate, leaving anxiety and despair in its place. Uncertainty of how secure we should feel with our future keeps us from ever being truly at peace. As skeptical humans, we think our hope is based on grasping at straws, but our despair is fully informed and perfectly rational. It does not take much to shift from hope to despair, but shifting from despair to hope is usually accompanied by “yeah, but what about tomorrow?”
God’s peace does not include a calculus about the future news being good or bad. Its foundation never changes, and therefore does not have a gauge that moves between hope and despair. Moreover, unlike worldly peace, you do not set out to get it so that you can have all the benefits it bestows. God’s peace is 100% about your relationship with Him and is in no way dependent on the circumstances you face, or what your future holds in this world.
Martyrs of the faith over hundreds of years faced horrible deaths the same way—with a sense of peace that was incomprehensible to those who observed it, but who did not share its foundation in their own lives. If God’s peace can provide this kind of calm assurance when facing a horrific demise, how much more is its calming solace when we face another stressful, but non-fatal event in our lives or in the life of a loved one? When we commend our cares to God and trust in His unfailing love to provide the answer to our prayers, we too can be at peace, even when the solution to our problem is not yet realized.
How exactly does God impart this peace to us? In addition to the passage in Philippians several other passages provide insight into how this happens:
The mind governed by the flesh is death, but the mind governed by the Spirit is life and peace. Romans 8:6
For the kingdom of God is not a matter of eating and drinking, but of righteousness, peace and joy in the Holy Spirit, Romans 14:17
May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in him, so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit. Romans 15:13
These passages indicate the connection between peace and the Holy Spirit. The key to having the Holy Spirit fill us with peace is to ask for the Spirit to abide in us each day.
Christ describes how this happens (John 14:16- 17):
16 And I will ask the Father, and he will give you another advocate to help you and be with you forever—
17 the Spirit of truth. The world cannot accept
him, because it neither sees him nor knows him. But you know him, for he lives with you and will be in you.
In John 15 Christ refers to the indwelling of the Spirit as “abiding” in us and we in Christ, as a branch ‘remains” in a vine. When our prayers for the filling of the Holy Spirit are answered (and God loves to hear and answer that prayer), God’s peace fills our heart along with the other gifts the Spirit brings into our life.
One of the best-known Bible verses about the fruit of the Spirit is Galatians 5:22-23:
22 But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, forbearance, kindness, goodness, faithfulness,
23 gentleness and self-control. Against such things there is no law.
Galatians 5:22-23
Commentaries on these verses point out what was mentioned earlier—that peace as described here is not what the secular mind might envision. Rather, it includes wholeness and harmony with God and living peaceably with others, even when the circumstances are far from tranquil.
“Peace” is not the belief that everything is going to work out as you want in your life. It is the belief that God is in control, and everything will go according to His plan for your life because that is what you want for your life. Joseph is a fitting example: Joseph could be enslaved and at peace, imprisoned and at peace, alone in a foreign land and at peace, and in constant danger of losing His life and at peace. Looking back, he told his brothers that human plans (his brothers’) were for ill, but God’s plan always was for Joseph to accomplish the good for many. God’s plan is always for the good, for us and others we serve. What could ever bring you more peace about your future than His plan coming true? When I trust Him to bring it to pass, I too can have that peace.
Trust, Gratitude and Joy
These three concepts have shown up various places in this essay (notice how in Romans 14:17, 15:13, and Galatians 5:22 Paul talks about peace and joy together, and Philippians 4:6-8 ties peace and gratitude [thanksgiving] together). That is because my own experience has shown me that I can put my complete trust in God to relieve me from anxiety and fill me with peace and yes, even joy, in every trial. Repeatedly in extreme distress, God has come through for me. As I chronicled in the essay “An Eyewitness to God’s Goodness” in the book Living Today as Though You Might Die Tomorrow, my journey with this sarcoma began with me reading Psalm 112:7
They will have no fear of bad news; their heart is steadfast, trusting in the Lord. Psalm 112:7
and realizing that God was alerting me to an impending bad news event. When I did receive the extremely bad news soon after, my immediate response was to put my trust in God to be with me every step of the way. When facing very dark and dangerous times I would think “I know this place. I have been here before with Jesus. He will be with me every moment until the storm passes.” (“I will take refuge in the shadow of your wings until the disaster has passed.” Psalm 57:1). To be there with Jesus is to know a peace that passes understanding. To see His mercies be delivered “new every morning” (Lamentations 3:23) is to be overwhelmed with gratitude for His amazing grace.
My head tells me “Look at the evidence—there have been innumerable occasions where God has intervened to bring you through exceedingly difficult times. He can be trusted to get you through every trial.” My heart tells me “What wonderous love is this that God cares so deeply for me? I have never done anything deserving of even His smallest favor, yet His love for me flows from an inexhaustible spring. My gratitude and joy is beyond measure.”
The Lord is my strength and my shield; my heart trusts in him, and he helps me. My heart leaps for joy, and with my song I praise him. Psalm 28:7
5 Yes, my soul, find rest in God; my hope comes from him.
6 Truly he is my rock and my salvation; he is my fortress, I will not be shaken.
7 My salvation and my honor depend on God; he is my mighty rock, my refuge.
8 Trust in him at all times, you people; pour out your hearts to him,
for God is our refuge. Psalm 62:5-8
My trust in, gratitude for, and rejoicing over the abundance of His grace are inexpressibly profound and marrow deep.
I’ve noticed that my gratitude has been manifested in a persistent urge to do what I can for the good of others. Certainly, the times we live in as I write this have provided many opportunities to contribute to the fund of the common good. I am reminded of Jana Stanfield’s quote: "I cannot do all the good that the world needs. But the world needs all the good I can do." In these perilous times I am doubly grateful—to God for His matchless grace and all His mercies to me, and gratitude for the opportunity to, even in a small way, be part of His web of blessing to deliver aid to others in need. I want that urge to be a constant presence.
Conclusion
In conclusion, I’m left thinking of a Bible verse and lyrics of a hymn that, while not mentioning peace, capture for me the essence of what it means to walk with Jesus in peace under circumstances that would produce extreme anxiety for someone without Christ in his/her life. The Bible verse is from Psalm 23, and I like the way The Voice translates it:
1 The Eternal is my shepherd, He cares for me always.
4 Even in the unending shadows of death’s darkness, I am not overcome by fear. Because You are with me in those dark moments, near with Your protection and guidance, I am comforted.
The hymn is How Firm a Foundation:
How firm a foundation, ye saints of the Lord, Is laid for your faith in His excellent Word! What more can He say than to you He hath said, To you who for refuge to Jesus hath fled?
“Fear not, I am with thee, O be not dismayed; For I am thy God, and will still give thee aid; I’ll strengthen thee, help thee, and cause thee to stand, Upheld by My righteous, omnipotent hand.”
perilous times I am doubly grateful—to God for His matchless grace and all His mercies to me, “I cannot do all the good that the world needs. But the world needs all the good that I can do.” In these and gratitude for the opportunity to, even in a small way, be part of His web of blessing to deliver aid to others in need. I want that urge to be a constant presence.
“When thro’ the deep waters I call thee to go, The rivers of sorrow shall not overflow; For I will be with thee, thy troubles to bless, And sanctify to thee thy deepest distress.” “When thro’ fiery trials thy pathway shall lie, My grace, all sufficient, shall be thy supply; The flame shall not hurt thee; I only design Thy dross to consume, and thy gold to refine.” “The soul that on Jesus hath leaned for repose,
I will not, I will not desert to His foes; That soul, though all hell should endeavor to shake, I’ll never, no never, no never forsake!”
Rippon’s A Selection of Hymns, 1787
Many of those who treasure these words have learned through searing trials this lesson: God can be trusted to deliver us from anxiety about our future and give us a peace that is far beyond what the world, or the secular mind is capable of comprehending. The only “sensible” thing to do is to put our trust in Him and gratefully and joyfully accept His priceless gift of peace to us.
